The Hammer
It’s a bad feeling to realize you’ve completely wasted your college existence. I spent 6 years in college paid a lot of money, and sat through an amazing number of hours of coursework to be HERE.
I went into education with goals, and dreams, and ideals. Those are all crushed now. I was moved to this location, and for the lack of any other job in the district I had to come here, or risk raising a family without a job. I tried 2 different times to go back to a school where I felt like I would be better matched. They wouldn’t let me. I’m now stuck here trying to overcome 80% of the kids who don’t want to be here in order to try and reach the 20% who do (sort of) just try getting your point across to 4 kids in a room of 20 where 16 of them are trying to avoid paying attention any way possible.
Each year I avoid writing referrals on students as long as possible. In the beginning of the year I’m usually in a better mood (usually) and have more patience. I’m also never pleased with the results in discipline, so I just avoid writing them. Each year, at some point, my limits reach critical mass, and I snap….then I write referrals at every opportunity possible. Not only do I want to punish the kids for being disrespectful, and hold them accountable for their poor choices, I also want to bury the admin with paperwork. This is a problem directly resulting in the way things are run, and because of such….the issues will be dealt with.
I refuse to show up to work and be disrespected. Therefore, I bring the hammer down from the point I’ve had enough until the end of the year.
I wrote 18 referrals in the past 2 days, and aim to do as many as it takes until my classroom is peaceful.
The ultimate point is that I never went to school for this. I run a holding pen for the kids that disrupt the “traditional” high schools. They are sent here to make learning possible for others both student and teacher. I’m a warden. Not what I went to school for
If I spent all 30 years here, I will have sacrificed almost 40,000 hours of life doing something that caused me grief.
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