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Year 4—There was no rain, but I am SO glad.

by admin on June 6th, 2007

Graduation has never been like this. I mean, it’s always in the same place…the same time, etc. The format is always the same. The graduates march in. They do the National Anthem….this year, somoen SANG it. I’m not a singer….even though I did win the American Idol video game…I’m NOT a singer. Neither is the girl who sang it this year. I was waiting for Mo’ Cheeks to come lend a hand. It was A) totally off key B) sang very nervous. C) Stopped several times so said nervousness could manifest itself as laughter. I give her all the credit for actually getting up there and trying…I wouldn’t do it. She’s got a bigger set than me.

The next step in the proceedings; The principal does his talk. The VP hands out the monetary awards. Those steps went well. Our VP cried..I think because they couldn’t have done it without him…it was as much his diploma as theirs.

Then we get to the diploma presentation. Our school only has about 30-40 graduates. Our small size allows us to let each of the kids say a few words….thank some folks for helping them, teachers, administrators, family….etc.

Typically, these “speches” Are very short and to the point…example, “I’d like to thank my parents, and teacher….thanks’

This year we had some special kids. One in particular was awesome. She came into our school on some serious drugs, was in and out of here for behavior issues, and failed drug tests. She cursed in class all the time. I believe I’ve written about her earlier this year. I was excited that she was going to get to hold a microphone, and speak to 400 people. She did NOT dissappoint. She left the exact same way she came in. I’ll paraphrase her speech…but it was awesome. Not only was the superintendent there, but 5 board memeber (that’s 4 more than we usually have)
The speech went something like this.

“WOoooooo I’d like to thank my mom for putting up with all my sh**…and Mr.——— and Mr. ——– they put up with a lot of sh** too…a LOT of sh**!!! I was a total f**** up..so yeah thanks for putting up with me.’

As soon as the F- bomb dropped it wiped away all memory of the previous s-bombs. The lady behind me said….”oh. no.”

I was hiding my head to avoid people watching me convulse with laughter. I know it’s going to be on youtube…it just has to. Our principal went tense. I felt kind of bad for him…it’s got to be hard watching someone (who we think was drunk) drop a f-bomb and ruin your graduation.

It didn’t ruin the evening…but boy did it make it memorable. There were some good speeches too, a lot of kids had lost loved ones…or dedicated their year to their kids (that’s weird for you, my reader, but not for me anymore….that’s par for the course) Nobody will ever remember those speeches….it’ll be forever remembered for the F-bomb.

Sober grad was not nearly as exciting.

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2 Comments
  1. The Gambler permalink

    So did anyone show up wearing camo? How did administration recover from the F-bomb speech?

    I think Captain should have been in charge of video production of this affair!

  2. Damn. I wish I could have dropped an F-bomb in my graduation speech. That would have been awesome.

    Also, I probably would have pissed myself if I’d been there. Kudos on keeping your cool, to an extent anyway.

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