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Year 2 Day 16- Whistle While You “Work”

by admin on September 13th, 2004

The acupuncture experience was far different than I expected. I went into the whole ordeal with the following expectations.

-I thought there’d be a lot of pins in my body
-I was skeptical of this ienergyi that flows through my body.
-I thought it wouldn’t hurt
-I didn’t expect to feel much while the pins were in place.
-I expected fruity music to be playing.

I was wrong. I went in the building and sat in the waiting room. The lady came out, and had me fill in some paperwork. It was the standard insurance paperwork, and previous medical history. The fruity music was playing. I felt pretty good about my prediction. After completing my paperwork I was put into a room, and asked to remove my shoes, and socks. The acupuncturist asked me a few questions, then had me lie on my back on top of a table. She pulled out a set of pins, and got into position to start placing them.

She put the first pin in the top of my right foot. The insertion of the pin didn’t hurt, but as soon as the pin was in, my foot felt itinglyi.

She put the second pin in the same spot in my Left foot. The tingling sensation was present there as well.

iMy feet are tingly… i

iI’m opening up the acupuncture pathways..i she told me.

Ok. Whatever.

She placed one in my right hand, on top, between the thumb and first finger, and did the same thing for my left hand. I felt a little more tingling in my hands. I was still skeptical at this point though. I assumed the sensation was probably caused more from the fact a pin was embedded in my flesh, than by some mystical Chinese remedy. She inserted a pin in my inner wrist, and I felt a surge of what felt like electricity bolt through my right hand.

iWHOOOOOOOAH!i I screamed.

The lady told me, that it was a good sign, the treatment was working. It felt like I touched a few wires on an electrical outlet or something, it was totally bizarre. It kind of scared me, because the next pin was being placed between my eyes. I didn’t want that same surge going anywhere near my head. Lucky for me, the head pin didn’t come with any electrical shock. After all 6 pins were inserted I laid on the bed for 20 minutes and let the pins do their work. I felt a vibrating affect in my whole body, It was both odd, and relaxing. When my 20 minutes were up, she removed the pins and sent me on my way, but not before I made my second appointment.

The remainder of the day I felt ultra relaxed. I had this lump on the bottom of one of my fingers prior to going in. I had assumed it was a bone spur or something, it felt really hard, and immovable. Whatever happened with those pins, it removed the lump from my finger. It’s no longer there. I was shocked. That, in addition to the electrical shock, convinced me that our bodies are way more complex than I ever imagined. I guess it’s been a part of Chinese medicine thousands of years for a reason. It took away my headache, or at least most of it, it relieved some of my stress, and the tension in my shoulders. Really, it was a lot more helpful than I’d thought it would be.

The coolest part was there were only 6 pins in me. I expected 40 or 50. I didn’t take any pictures, because the pins were really hard to see, plus the lack of pins made it unimpressive to photograph. I think the low number of pins was due in part to the fact it was my first time with acupuncture. I have the feeling that lady could have lit me up like a Christmas tree at will if she wanted to.

LISTEN, LISTEN, HIS NOSE IS WHISTLIN’

There is an old guy who works here. I won’t say he teaches here, but he is “employed” here. He’s nearing 80. When I’m his age I hope to God I am sitting somewhere exotic drinking a foo-foo drink with a little umbrella in it. His nose whistles when he breathes. It’s one of the reasons I don’t eat in the staff room. It annoys the crap out of me. It’s so loud, that coupled with his age, it makes him even more hard of hearing. You have to repeat things like 4 times, all the while his nostrils are whistling Dixie. Today I watched him struggle with opening a bag of potato chips. He was trying to rip it like you would a piece of paper, when clearly it was to be opened by pulling the sides apart. When he gave up and started hunting for a sharp utensil to open the bag with, I snatched it from him, opened it with a gentle tug, then returned it to him. He looked shocked. I bet early chip bags in the 1920’s were a pain to open. This man is also the phantom pisser, I know it. (The phantom pisser is the person, presumably male, who leaves urine all over the male staff bathroom.)

Ali Babbah And The 40 Kicks To The Head.

The girl who got in a fight last week returned today. She spent the entire class period trying to convince everyone she didn’t get beat up, even though she got kicked in the head like, 100 times.

Ok. Whatever.

iI was laughing the whole time… .If that b*tch wouldn’t have sucker punched me, I’d have knocker her out… I mean, seriously, who uses legs instead of punching… if her arms weren’t so weak she wouldn’t have been kicking me, and I could have beat her ass.i

I think kicking probably does considerably more damage, plus, if your hands are firmly entrenched in someone’s hair, kicking just might be your only option, and the head is probably a good target. That’s just me though.

The poor girl was mad because she couldn’t go after this girl who kicked her face up. iThe cops will blame me for whatever happens to her…I’d beat her ass though, you all know it.i

You know what dear, sometimes it’s better to just let things go. I’d like to inform you, that behavior like this is exactly what got your skull boot-whipped about 50 times in the first place.

Meeting Adjourned.

Man our faculty meetings are painful. I can’t put into words how hard it is for me to sit there and pretend I care. They discuss things that 90% of the time are strictly re-clarification on something that happened last week.

iI don’t understand about—–i

Then we spend 20 minutes going over that AGAIN, so someone who couldn’t grasp it a week ago can comprehend what we’re talking about. Our meetings need a leader who conducts meetings like this;

iItem number 1 ——–, This is how this goes, this is what happens, how many people understand?[ if everyone but one or two people understand, move on] If you have questions, come see me after the meeting.

Item number 2, is this, it’s done this way, and that way, any questions?i

If we just spent the meeting stating the item, how it’s done and the major information regarding it, then moved on, we’d get done so much quicker. Allowing questions only if everyone doesn’t understand. It’s sad but 99% of the time it’s one of the female teachers who needs stuff re-explained to them. When it’s re-explained it always leads to other ladies having more questions, which leads to a totally off topic discussion, and throws our meeting off schedule 20 more minutes. It takes us an hour to go through 3 agenda items.

We have this new rule where we’re being asked to sit on campus, until our contract hours are done, which for us is 3:12. On Monday’s we have minimum days, which put us out at 12:38. Our meeting ended at 2:15 today, so now I have an hour to just sit, and rot here. I have way more important stuff to do elsewhere, I guarantee. I have children who need picked up from daycare. I have no work to do, I did 90% of my grades today. I’m done with work. I still have to sit here, and ibe availablei should a parent wish to contact me. This has happened exactly zero times in the 4 years I’ve been here.

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