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Under the big top- Year 2 Day 2 A.M. post

by admin on August 20th, 2004

Ok boys and girls have a seat, we have a lot to cover this morning. I just returned from the free doughnut and cheap coffee welcome back meeting… sadly to say the coffee was worse than usual, and there were NO doughnuts… strictly scones this year. I enjoyed the scones though, they were a better than expected change.

The event kind of follows a standard procession. All the school sites introduce their new members, and the principals say a little bit about how excited they are about this year, and so on. It’s usually followed by a motivational speaker of some kind, or some positive encouraging words from our district leaders.

This year was different.

We had what I can only describe as a horse and pony show. It was above and beyond anything I’ve witnessed in my nearly 10 years of teaching. There was this iskiti where these “parents” were trying to transfer their kid out of our district, and the district wanted to show them what types of programs we offered before they made their final decision.

This is where it got weird.

They sat the two mock parents in front of this movie screen that played a series of infomercials about our district, and what we offered in terms of reading and math specialists. As they showed these different specialists on the screen the actual person came dancing into the gym, in some funky costume, to a disco song… it was seriously over the friggin’ top. I was embarrassed. It went on for about 20 individuals, some of which had NO business dancing anywhere, let alone in a crowded gym full of their peers. When all the specialists had come through the building, the high school cheerleaders came out and did routines… seriously, it was so off the wall, I’m still recovering, and in total denial that it even happened.

I found myself saying things like.

iWhat’s happening here?i

iIs this really going on?i


iDo they really do this for all transfer requests, because honestly, it’d make me pull my kids out right away.i

iIt’s not over yet?i

I was relieved when it was over, it was like being at a college party where someone you kind of know gets way too drunk and starts doing something horrible. You feel really embarrassed for them, and for yourself because someone might assume you’re with them. I wish they’d piled them all in an undersized car with clown make-up on and had them run out and throw balloon animals at us, it’d have been considerably less traumatic.

That being said…

This district has a ton of really great teachers, that I’d love for my kids to have as teachers, but because we’re located in the underprivileged part of the county, people kind of assume the worst about the district. I know I used to assume the worst before I worked here. Really. Parents should feel totally good about sending their kids here, there are great teachers, new facilities being built, etc. I would have liked some of my colleagues as teachers when I was in school.

you should send your kids here, especially to the traditional high school because for the most part it’s scumbag free, I should know, they’re all here.

I was thinking last night that I detest a lot of regular education teachers, because honestly they don’t have any idea how fortunate they are. They don’t have to deal with the type of kid I do. They get to their limit with a bad student, then send them to us… that’s not fair. They have all these success stories they can look at each year, to place value in what they do 180 days a year. We don’t get a lot of success stories here. When your version of a success story is; such and such got a JOB at Wendy’s, that’s not real uplifting.

Think back to the last sport you played… how much fun was losing all your games? It’s wasn’t. Losing in any capacity is not fun. I envy NBA players who play for a losing team, decide it sucks, then request a trade to another team. I can’t do that. There’s no stipulation in my contract that says if I’m unhappy about my situation I can A) request to be moved to another school, or B) Not show up for work until they pay me enough to dull my senses. I wish teachers had agents.

iYes, my client is isn’t showing up for school until he receives 50K more a year, and reduced payments for his benefits. He’d like a surround sound system for his computer, and a larger screen television, HDTV ready. We’d like some incentives as well. If his students can advance to a 4th grade reading level by the end of the year, and learn to write in almost complete sentences, that’s going to require a $1,000 payment, per student. If his demands aren’t met, my client would like to be traded to a traditional high school where he can teach the subjects, and student he desires. My client is very firm on this, and will be sitting out the school year at your expense until the situation is taken care of.i

That’d be nice… it’d make teachers want to work harder… we’d teach a lot better during contract years, try to win national awards and stuff… tear our ACL’s and go home for the year. Make a boatload of money, then decide to retire 2 days before school started…it’d be awesome.

This will be my A.M. post. We have other stuff to get done today. I’ve secured a classroom full of desks, now I need to figure out how I want them facing.

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One Comment
  1. Eduardo permalink

    So when do the little delinquents show up?

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